Proposal
OUR PROPOSAL STORY IS ENTITLED: "ANXIETY."
YOU'LL SEE WHY.
Chapter 1: Princess Cut, Micro-pave Anxiety. With a halo.
After a very, very short time of dating (plus or minus a few years) it's time to get engaged. Incredible! I even know where I'm going to do it: Bali. But first thing's first - have to get a ring. How hard can that be?
Working with a close family friend, I began the work on selecting a diamond. It's three months before we leave for Bali - plenty of time.
"No, not that diamond."
"Eh, not bad but I don't like the color."
"I like the color! But I don't like the size."
"Great size! Great color! But what about those inclusions?"
"You know what - I know I said princess cut - but maybe we should try a round cut instead?"
"That was a mistake. Let's stick with princess cut."
"You know what, just show me every diamond you have."
Finally, I picked the perfect diamond. After providing the exact specs for the setting and ring, it was finally time to have the ring created and delivered. No sweat - there was plenty of time before we leave for Bali.
No. That was incorrect. It took me so long to pick a diamond that the full ring wasn't going to be delivered until three days before we leave for Bali. If it's not exactly what I wanted there would be no time to correct it.
Great.
Enter anxiety, stage left.
My chest was tight for two weeks straight. I lost 4 pounds due to stress. Pretty sure I also got my first gray hair.
Finally the ring was delivered. After picking up the package from FedEx, I sat in my car for 15 minutes unable to open the box. I finally mustered the courage to open the box - and - well - it was perfect...
Chapter 2: I'll take the ring. Hold the insurance, but extra anxiety, please.
With three days to go before we leave for Bali, I finally had the ring; now it's time to insure the ring to protect the investment from the unthinkable.
I had all of the paperwork set up - nine pages of material in total. A tolerable inconvenience - knowing the biggest purchase I've ever made is protected is the perfect antidote to any anxiety.
The day before our Aug 22nd departure I hear back from the insurance company. My application was denied. Why? Because on September 5th, 2014 our unit was broken into which represents a "claim"; the insurance company won't provide coverage for anyone who has had a claim of any kind within the past three years.
For those keeping score at home, that means that in a mere 15 days I could have had the insurance and the peace of mind. Instead? You guessed it. I get to travel half-way around the world with an uninsured ring.
Hello anxiety, my old friend.
You know the perfect compliment to anxiety? Paranoia.
I was convinced that everyone was out to steal my uninsured ring.
The security guard that wanted me to keep walking through metal detectors even though my bag hadn't gone through X-Ray yet ("I have to wait until it clears X-Ray those are the rules!!)
The flight attendant who politely asked if I wanted to put my bag in the overhead ("NO!! Sorry... DIdn't mean to yell... But it's fine, right where it is. Thank you.")
I spent 26 hours of total flight time clutching my bag to my chest, afraid to let it leave my side. I didn't sleep one moment despite spending a full day in the air.
Nataly? Well, you be the judge...
Chapter 3: What came first - the sweat or the anxiety?
We made it safely to Bali and made it to day 3: Proposal Day. So far everything has been picture perfect. The private villa is amazing (seriously, check the video), the location is perfect, the weather couldn't be more ideal and nothing has happened to my still uninsured ring. I had the proposal all planned out: A private sunset dinner on a pier overlooking the ocean at a top five-star resort. Bali is known for their beautiful sunsets. I'll propose right when the sun is touching the horizon - on bended knee and a half open box (what can I say - I'm a traditionalist). Key to the plans - she has no clue. I told her we were checking out a good restaurant I read about online. After extensive planning, I was confident I had thought through everything!
Villa
Well - technically - not everything.
After a day at the spa for each of us (had to get a fresh cut and she absolutely HAD to do something about those nails - just saying) it was time to get dressed for the big dinner. I already knew what I was going to wear - that shirt with those pants - you know the ones!
I got dressed and was ready to go early when I realized a critical flaw in my plan. I had this big ring box with and these fitted (ok, tight) pants. It would be incredibly obvious if I just looked to be casually carrying a Rubik's cube in my pocket. How in the hell was I supposed to pull off the surprise if I couldn't hide the box?
Oh, hello anxiety. I didn't see you come in. Make yourself at home.
Luckily my years of watching MacGiver paid off. I went to the two people working concierge - who spoke very little English - and asked them for saran wrap. The puzzled look on their faces told me I wasn't connecting. I tried a different approach: "Do you have plastic wrap? I need to hide something on my body." Their puzzled looks turned to horror. They whispered frantically to each - glanced at me, whispered, glanced back at me, whispered some more. I didn't see what the big deal is - didn't they realize what I was trying to do?
I didn't have time for this - my anxiety was threatening my consciousness. Finally - albeit reluctantly - they agreed to send some plastic wrap to our villa. About five minutes later, they showed up with a giant roll of plastic wrap. The person delivering looked uneasy - and took an unusually long time of looking around the villa before handing over the plastic wrap. I thanked him (at least I think I did - the nerves and anxiety were forming a weird cocktail of emotions) and then went to work.
Outside of taking my entire book bag to dinner (which may have set off some alarm bells with Nataly and concierge), I knew the only way to smuggle the ring to the dinner undetected was to saran warp it to the small of my back.
Yes, you read that correctly. It was the only place where there was loose, flowing material that would conceal a 2 cubic-inch box.
So I turned myself into a mummy and wrapped my torso in plastic wrap so as to secure the ring to the small of my back. Truthfully, it worked out really well. Fun fact - turns out your body tends to sweat more - a lot more - when you cover it non-breathing plastic.
Eh - keeping the proposal a secret is worth a sweaty back.
One disaster, down.
Chapter 4: As the sun sets, the anxiety rises.
With a concealed ring and a sweaty torso, I'm finally ready to depart for dinner.
I've planned this out to the T.
Hair is cut and her nails are done.
I've looked into literally every restaurant in Bali to find the perfect setting (and yes, I'm using "literally" correctly).
I've checked the sunset time - 6:08pm.
I've charted out the way to dinner, compared all forms of transportation, and settled on a personal driver.
I've timed it out perfectly - pick up at the hotel at 4:45pm, arrive at the resort where we'll be eating at 5:30pm.
Have drinks ordered in time to be delivered right after 6pm - in time for the sunset.
I've worked with the restaurant to ensure someone can take pictures of the big moment.
I've confirmed, double confirmed and triple confirmed the reservation with the restaurant.
I've spent two months planning for this moment.
I'm prepared. I'm focused. A bit nervous. But I'm ready.
At 4:40pm I tell Nataly to meet me out front - I want to make sure the driver has arrived and everything is ready. The driver is indeed there and even has a bottle of water for each of us. Winning.
4:45pm. Nataly should be arriving at any moment. Right on time. I'm nervous - but primarily good nerves. I feel focused, ready to make the biggest move of my life.
4:50pm. Still no Nataly. No big deal - I built in about a 5 minute cushion. As long as she comes out, like, right now, we'll be fine.
4:55pm. PANIC. DISTRESS. DISMAY. HYSTERIA. ANXIETY. BETRAYAL. WHERE IS SHE?! I TOLD HER 4:45PM!! I HAVE NO CONTROL OVER THE SUN - AND I LITERALLY SEE IT RACING FOR THE HORIZON!! HOW CAN SHE DO THIS TO ME?! I SARAN-WRAPPED A RING TO MY BACK FOR HER!! YOU KNOW WHAT, THAT'S IT - NO SUNSET MEANS NO PROPOSAL - I'M CALLING IT OFF!! I'M DON- "oh hey Nataly. You look beautiful. Ready?"
We're finally en route, but ten minutes late. The sun is speeding across the sky in an attempt to set as quickly as possible - just to spite me. Apparently today is also the International Jump-On-Your-Moped-and-Drive-As-Slow-As-Possible Day. Also, I'm not sure who designed the street light system in Bali, but they deserve a special place in hell for making us hit every single red light. Sometimes twice. I spent the first 15 minutes (or three hours, it was hard to tell) staring up at the sun and cursing every time we stopped at a light. At one point the driver tried to make small talk: "So where are you two from?" My response? "Yes." What can I say - I was distracted by two months of planning unraveling in front of my eyes.
Nataly turns to me and says "You seem a little anxious. Why don't you sit back and relax?" Little did she know that I couldn't sit back due to a ring box pressing against my L2 and L3 vertebrae; Not to mention the sweat that's pouring from my torso due to the saran wrap.
I responded with "It's 5:10pm." Was that even the question? I don't know. My anxiety wouldn't let me focus. Next thing I knew Nataly was nudging me, telling me that we're here. That's right - my anxiety literally knocked me unconscious.
Most importantly, the sun was still up. Big sigh of relief. Proposal still on.
Chapter 5: Anxiety be damned - Move to the left.
We finally made it. The sun is still shining. I'm well rested. I even think I've lost a few pounds from the saran-wrap torso sweat. So far so good.
The restaurant we'll be eating at is within an amazing five star resort called the Ayana in Jimbaran. You might recognize it by their world-famous "Rockbar" - a bar/restaurant carved right into the cliff side, allowing guests a front row experience to some of the most amazing sunsets in the world.
My plan upon arrival was to navigate our way through this massive resort to the restaurant. I wasn't quite sure where it was or how exactly to get there, but I figured we could just follow signs and find our way.
As soon as we stepped foot into the Ayana, we were greeted by name by perhaps the nicest Balinese person who's ever lived. (Editor's Note: Upon reflection and after months of scientific research, I have determined conclusively with irrefutable evidence that he is, indeed, the nicest Balinese person who has ever walked this Earth).
This greeting was a bit of a shock to me as I had been coordinating with the resort by email for several weeks and they never mentioned a welcome host waiting upon our arrival. I didn't think anything of it until one terrifying question set in - does this nice gentleman know that the impending proposal was meant to be a surprise? That a simple "congratulations on your engagement" could ruin months and months of meticulous planning?
Suddenly, the world lost color. The sound of birds, waves and soft breeze ruffling the trees was replaced by a dull but deafening inner-ear buzz. My eye sight was reduced to a single pinpoint of light. My palms and underarms were in a race to see who could produce the most sweat the fastest. How could I have left such an important detail to chance??
Fortunately, our host was a lot savvier than I - he didn't allude to the proposal at all - instead, offering to show us around the resort on our way to the restaurant.
Whew
For the next thirty minutes, our host guided us around the most beautiful resort I've ever seen. Not only was every detail of the resort thought through and executed flawlessly, but so was our short tour.
At almost every turn, there was a smiling Ayana employee greeting us by name with a traditional Balinese greeting. One host gave each of us a flower leis necklaces. Another host helped position us for the perfect cliff side picture. Yet another allowed us to choose the lobster for dinner (don't worry, we didn't actually eat the lobster. Weird twist to the story though - we left with two new pets).
Towards the end of the tour - and after passing about four other restaurants - Nataly asked where our restaurant was? Truth be told, I couldn't help but notice how that big fiery ball in the sky seemed to be slowly descending to the ocean.
At that very moment - almost as if the resort planned this timing - we turned a corner and saw a pier jutting out almost 50 yards into the ocean. Nataly noticed it and commented "Oh that's really cool! Wait... That's not for us, is it?"
Spoiler Alert: Yes, that was for us.
The resort had set up a private table at the end of the pier just for us.
No, seriously. And as amazing as that is, that was only part of the experience.
At the beginning of the pier, there was a two person Balinese band greeting us with beautiful island music. Nataly and I even got the chance to play a bit. I won. (You may be asking yourself - was it even a contest? The answer is - that's irrelevant. I won.)
After receiving a complimentary welcome drink, we worked our way down the pier. At the end of the pier was a solitary table, flanked by two tiki torches and a heart made up of rose petals. Even the menu was personalized for us: "Nataly and Jason's Personal Dinner Menu." And despite all of my worrying, the sun was still hanging tough in the sky.
Actually, after giving it a second look... the sun was perfectly hanging in the sky. Peak sunset. Just barely hovering above the water. In fact - was that a fist bump or a solar flare? And with a sudden crash of reality, I knew.
It was time.
"Would you guys like a picture in front of the sunset?"
How did he know? No seriously, how the hell did he know?
We stood - and with a few yanks on the saran wrap (forgot about that didn't you? Yup, still there) I transferred the ring box to my pocket. I handed my phone to our host, turned and walked with Nataly to the very edge of the pier by the railing.
Deep breath. This is it. The moment we'll always remember. The moment I've been planning on for months - no, years. This is what all little boys dream of - and I'm living it. I'm here with my best friend and love of my life in Bali in front of the most beautiful sunset you could ever imagine. But something was missing... I couldn't place my finger on it, but I knew something was conspicuously absent. And then it hit me - the anxiety. For once on this journey half way around the world - I was anxiety free. Everything was perfect. Nothing to be anxious about.
I turned to Nataly. Grabbed her hand. Looked deep in her eyes, and started. "Nataly..."
"Could you guys move to the left?"
ARE YOU SERIOUS?! IS HE CRAZY?! YOU'RE GOING TO INTERRUPT ME NOW?! WHAT IS THIS GUY DOING TO ME?! IS HE TRYING TO KILL ME?! WE HAVE THE DEVIL AS A HOST!! SATAN HAS SOMEHOW COMMANDEERED THIS PERFECT EVENING AND RUINED MY PROPOSAL!!
I stifled my internal anxiety monster rising inside of me (or was that vomit?) and responded "Just one second," turning back to Nataly.
Deep breath. Start again.
"Nataly..."
"No just move a little to the left."
At this point I'm plotting his death. The anxiety monster inside of me has turned murderous. Do bodies float? Who actually saw him with us this evening? I'm smart enough to get away with it - I'm sure of it.
Against the wishes of my inner felon, we shifted to the left and... well... I'm glad we shifted to the left.
Chapter 6: A bed of roses. And anxiety.
I can't believe it. We're finally engaged. This day has been both impossibly long and impossibly short. But in the end, everything was absolutely perfect.
We had an amazing five course dinner there at the end of the pier. With the weight of the proposal now behind me, I noticed for the first time the slight tropical breeze; the crashing of the waves nearby; the sound of a distant bird. I was on cloud nine. I sat back in my chair, took a deep breath and reflected on what an incredible day this had been.
I remember looking over at Nataly expecting her to be deep in reflection as well.
Nope - just deep in her ring. SMH.
Finally, once the meal was done it was time to leave. We made a quick stop at the W to have a celebratory drink and enjoy each other's company before we let all of you know the great news. Rude, I know - but figured you wouldn't mind waiting another hour or two.
We were making our way back to the hotel when all of a sudden I had a heart attack.
OK that may be a little extreme, but my heart definitely skipped a beat when I realized I never got confirmation from the hotel for Phase II of the night. I was so consumed with the actual proposal that I completely forgot to follow up with the hotel.
Here I am thinking the anxiety had left me. Nope - just taking a nap. Nice to see you again.
We pulled up to the hotel and got out of the car. As we passed concierge on the way to our villa, the concierge discreetly (not so discreetly) asked if she said yes. When I confirmed, he then presented Nataly with a bouquet of long stem roses. Whew. That's a good sign.
As we crossed through the outside door to our private villa, I then received confirmation that the hotel had indeed held up their end of the bargain. We were immediately greeted by candle luminaries lighting the walkway downstairs to our room. As we reached the ground floor and turned the corner, rose petals paved the rest of the way to the outdoor tub, which had been filled with milk / honey and covered with rose petals. #Winning.
Inside, the candles and rose petals continued leading us past the counter where a bottle of Moet was waiting in a bucket of ice with two champagne glasses - flanked on each side by two candles - one reading "Jason" and the other "Natali" (eh, I misspell things too. Oh well. #StillWinning).
The path of rose petals and candles finished in the bedroom where we found a long stem rose placed on each pillow, a large heart at the foot of the bed made entirely of rose petals, a basket of chocolate covered strawberries and a gift certificate for a free couples massage. #SoMuchWinning.
We poured a glass of champagne, toasted to the perfect day - and then - finally - let all of our friends and family know we were finally engaged. Three hours later we were still face timing and texting all of you (!!).
Truthfully and all joking aside, it was a true highlight to the day. Even though we were halfway around the world, our friends and family are so important to us - getting to relive the experience virtually with many of you and having you as a part of our special day made the occasion that much sweeter.
Similarly, as we near our wedding day, we can't imagine starting this next chapter without all of our closest friends and family by our side - so we sincerely hope you join us in September and help us celebrate. It wouldn't be the same without you.
I'll even promise to leave my anxiety at home.
Epilogue
There's no way the honeymoon will beat the proposal. It's all downhill from here.
Damn.